"Customer" Vs. "Cuss-omer"

There are 3 types of people in this world:

- Self-sufficient men and women

A self-sufficient man or woman (hence-forth referred to as a "Self-sufficient person") grows their own animals and vegetables, and pays little or no heed to most of our city-slicker problems. They are not the focus in this post so I'll leave it at that.

- Customers

Customers buy things or services from businesses and both parties deal with each other using respect and understanding. Conversations are carried out in a kind and smooth back-and-forth motion which makes use of both careful and thoughtful explanations, whilst listening with intent.

- Cuss-omers

That... That's pretty accurate :P

Even though the words sound the same if you say them fast, Customers and Cuss-omers are very different. Somehow, no matter how old a Cuss-omer is, they have the ability to revert back to the mind-set of a 3-year-old in a split second. A swearing 3-year-old with an overly-developed body. 6 million years of evolution so that you can throw a tantrum because you can't have what you want? If you're a cuss-omer and you don't have any babies yet, please don't.

An easy way to spot a cuss-omer is the way they treat people. Tell-tale signs include, but are not limited to:

• Throwing toys out of their cot,
• Swearing for no good reason (there is no good reason to swear at a store's employee),
• Throwing things - your own property or otherwise,
• Not listening at all,
• Being ridiculous.

Warning! Customers may turn into cuss-omers at a moments notice, and cuss-omers sometimes pretend to be customers to fool you into being nice before they explode in your face. There isn't any tried-and-tested method to deal with cuss-omers, the best way to handle the situation is by not throwing your toys at them in return.

Oh sweet humanity...

When faced with such regressed beings I prefer to perceive them as though I'm watching Animal Planet. Don't take it personally, because they don't know whom or what to direct their anger at. That's exactly why they throw things and hurt the defenseless inanimate objects around them in their rage. Just back away and watch the show, ducking for cover when necessary...

Yours in writing
Benjamin

I philosophise, therefore I am

I philosophise on some philosophical philosophies from time to time, even if they're just my frantic thoughts and ramblings. Thinking of things is often quite fun, having new ideas...

A so-called "Cog in the Machine"?
Don't be one if you can help it.

But now I have no idea what else to write about on the subject... Any ideas?

No?

Come on, it's okay, I won't bite.

I'm waiting...

Well, if you don't want to help me out then that's fine!

I'll just throw a tantrum and write a short story!

The Philosopher

A boy, only in his teens. He literally has the entire world ahead of him to go and explore. A hundred thousand choices and a million paths he could take each and every day. With the endless world of possibilities in front of him, there's only one thing to do!

Think. Think long and hard about it.

"Now what? I need to ponder on my future for a while, so I guess I'll get a job in the meantime!"

After a "short while" turned into a "Longer amount of time" the boy become a young man. Using time to think of what he wants to do in life can't have been a bad decision right? I mean, he doesn't want to mess up and waste time on pointless endeavors. And the last thing he wants to do is grow old with regrets from paths not taken. So then what is the right decision to make for his future? Should he be studying something or working somewhere? But he has no idea what to do or where to do it... Will he ever know for sure?

So he works and lives and marries with kids,
day to day thinking and dreaming of things.
But what will he do? He has no dreams of his own
He has no true goals and he feels like a drone.
If he moves, will he fall or fly?
Thinking too much by-and-by,
He may truly love life,
Hates to waste it though.
So what comes next?
Try to move...
Live life...
How?

THE END!

Hm... That was terrible. Depressing even... Glad I'm not that guy! What to do now?...

Yours in writing
Benjamin

Silly Cellphone Games

Some games,
most of which I don't actually play...
Just a good stock image to portray
my topic of games.

The likes of which have you tapping away on your phone for hours. Well, they get me hooked quite easily! I downloaded the Plants Vs. Zombies 2 and Nimble Quest android games (among others) that are so much fun! Maybe even TOO much fun D: Oh, and I got Alchemy which is ridiculously entertaining for such a simple game. You put elements together (starting with Earth, Water, Air and Fire) to create all the wonders of the universe from life, to planets, and even movies! Much fun can be had from this silly game. My friend and I have made around 300 of the 390 items available in this game, sharing our discoveries so that we can win faster! Teamwork B)

Super-powers

What super-power would you have if you could choose one? I'd like to be able to calm people down and make them tranquilly happy with only the sound of my voice. That would be a great power! No conflicts or concerns, just blissful happiness... I hate fights. If I could avoid every single one I probably would, though that's not possible in this world we live in. If you interact with people there will be conflicts! Full-stop! Period! END! OF! SENTENCE!

As humans, we need others in our life (to hold onto our sanity obviously, solitude is completely maddening!). However, to completely understand another human is a near impossible feat. People always have conflicting ideas and ideals, and if you were to find somebody that thought in exactly the same way as you do, you would probably get bored of them. If you really want to talk to yourself then do that. But if you want to have a real conversation then talk to another person. If you are able to have a real conversation with yourself, I suggest you keep that to yourself... People that think like you do are too often mis-understood and locked up in a small room with a hug jacket on :(

"It's a perfect fit! You look all the rage, darl"

A poem for my pretties:

I love my jacket, need my jacket, hug my jacket daily.

I share my jacket with myself and sometimes I'm a lady.

They say my friends inside my head are all a little crazy.

My jacket says that I'm the best, it keeps nice and cozy.

Stay sane my readers
Yours in writing
Benjamin