02 November, 2015

Knives and sharp, pointy, shiny metallic objects

I like knives! They look so cool, slice so swiftly, puncture superfluously, dice decisively, and shine so shiny-ly! I enjoy collecting sharp things. Knives, ninja stars, shuriken(s?), metal shaped thingies, and pocket knives. On the rare occasion I even leave the house with one or two for situations where I need to cut things! Because they do that well... Obviously... and you never know, someone might pull a knife on me! And then I can be like: "Don't hurt me man, please just take this nice shiny knife and leave me alone! It was expensive..." and that will distract them from taking my phone. That would be an ideal outcome...
Shiny and sharp objects that sadly I do not own.
I want to...

Pain and uncomfortable things
GIF from ASDF Movie. Watch it now!
An example of something I find funny.


I don't like pain! Never! Pain makes it hard to live, it's too easy to dwell on it - physical or emotional - and time goes by wasted. Happy living is healthy living! Maintain a happy soul! Which brings me to the next topic: Laughter!

Everyone has a different sense of humour, even if only a fraction of a degree different from, E.G., your best friend. Mine, I've been told, is pretty twisted. That would be why I joke about grim subjects every now and again, like choking on a hamster. I know that a joke such as this is crossing the line for some people, but what can I say? I love it! Likewise I enjoy dead baby jokes (there are a lot and they're all horrible) and I enjoy jokes that don't make complete sense. In other words, jokes that use round-about flawed logic to prove an irrational point. If you want an example, too bad! I can think of none. If you know of one, or just want to share a joke of your own that you find ridiculously funny, please comment below!

How to comment on some-body's blog post (for beginners):


It has occurred to me that many people don't know how to comment on a post (that has become clear to me, since I don't get flooded by comments...). It's really quite simple! There are a couple of ways to go about it, firstly you can just click on the title of the post to bring it up alone in a window, and at the bottom of the post you can write words in the word box! Then you can select a profile to comment as, choose an alias or go under the name "Anonymous" if you don't want me to know who you are, and simply click "Publish". Of course the "Anonymous" option only applies if you say something really REALLY flattering and you get embarrassed easily. Alternatively, there's a little line below the post that either says "No Comments" or "(Insert no. of comments here) Comments", just click on that! Lastly, if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all (as my parents used to say). Please be gentle...

Yours in writing
Benjamin

12 comments:

  1. Thanks for the clear instructions, Ben! Not that I needed them...

    Q: What's green with red wheels and hangs from a tree?

    A: A leaf. I lied about the wheels.

    You knew that one already, though.

    ReplyDelete
  2. THAT IS SO UNFAIR! That was my one joke. Thanks, Caroline. *sheesh* Now I don't know what to say.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Great job Ben.
    Unfortunately I'm not very good with jokes so I'm not going to give one

    ReplyDelete
  4. Did I get it right....Benjammin? (that was my joke)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, good job my Anonymous reader whom I shan't make the identity known :) (Psst, who are you? Just between us...)

      Delete
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